Newlywed Apartment: 4 Tips for Sharing Housework

When you are a newlywed, it can seen as though the honeymoon will last forever. Well, that is, until the garbage hasn’t been taken out, the dishes aren’t done, and the apartment is getting a bit dusty. There’s nothing like apartment living to wake newlywed couples up to the real world. However, there are ways that the honeymoon bliss can continue, if you both put in equal efforts and take the time to figure out a way to make one another’s life easier.

1. Communicate on Multiple Levels

Make sure to talk to your spouse about the housework early on; it’s even best to talk about it before the wedding, before you move in together. This may sound extreme, but establishing what you both reasonably expect will make adjusting to life as a married couple far less shocking. It will reduce disappointment as well. Let each other know what you expect. Some women expect men to do certain chores, such as cutting the grass or dealing with heavy lifting; some men also have housework expectations for women. Before inciting a war of the sexes in your young marriage, talk it out with an open mind.

2. Get It In Writing

While the housework agreement is not as important a document as the marriage certificate, it can certainly help keep things in harmony. Speak about how frequently you think each housework chore needs to be done, then establish who is going to do what chore. It may be that you rotate who does what chore every other week, or you may simply opt to always do the same chores, depending on your preferences. Write down the chores, then make a chore chart or schedule, which indicates how often each chore gets done and who does it. Having it in a clear, fairly composed chart will eliminate more than a few arguments.

3. Do What You Enjoy

When it comes to chores, most people have particular ones that irk them the most, whether it’s dealing with trash or cleaning the bathroom. If there are some chores that you dislike the most, let your new spouse know. Chances are, you both don’t have the same pet peeve chore. You may even make a list of least-hated to most-liked chores. By at least eliminating the things that you most hate to do, housework can seem much less of a chore.

4. Reward One Another with Praise

Most newlywed couples make the mistake of nagging, fussing and putting down their new spouse over the things that they perceive is going wrong, the things that don’t get done according to the pre-wedding expectations. However, it’s more effective and conducive to a more productive spouse if you praise one another over what is done right. Instead of fussing that the trash was taken out twelve hours behind schedule, praise the chores that the spouse did on time and well. Not only will it help motivate him to do more, it will help the marriage grow stronger as well. No one is happy in an environment of negativity, after all.